Vanessa Bryant Says She 'Can't Process' Her Loss

After being "reluctant to put my feelings into words" since the deaths of her husband and 13-year-old daughter, Vanessa Bryant shared some of her pain and grieving process Monday. "My brain refuses to accept that both Kobe and Gigi are gone," she posted on Instagram. "I can’t process both at the same time." The former NBA star and Gianna were among nine people killed in a helicopter crash last month. They were on their way to a basketball tournament; the Instagram post included a Slam magazine video about Kobe coaching Gianna’s team, the Los Angeles Times reports. "Praying for all of the victims of this horrible tragedy," Bryant wrote.

Bryant expressed anger but added that she realizes it's part of the grieving process. She said she's grateful to be with her three daughters—Natalia, 17; Bianka, 3; and Capri, 7 months, per People—and knows she has to remain strong for their sake. "I just wanted to share in case there's anyone out there that's experienced a loss like this," Bryant wrote. "God I wish they were here and this nightmare would be over." (More Kobe Bryant stories.)