What Not to Text Your Probation Officer

A guy in Albany, Ga., texted his probation officer by mistake asking, "You have any weed?" The probation officer then showed up at the errant texter's house with drug agents who found a bag of cocaine, reports WALB. And that's why Alvin Cross is not only going back to prison for violating his parole, he's serving an extra year. The story seems to have hit a sweet spot of dumb criminal/tech gaffe, because Cross is the butt of a lot of jokes out there:

• Atlanta Journal-Constitution: "You don’t have to be stupid to go to prison, but it helps."
• Gawker: "If you were to get high and make a list of people who, hypothetically, you would not want to text with a request for weed, 'probation officer' would probably be near the top."

• Death and Taxes: "Here’s a little pro-tip: If you find yourself on probation from jail, under no circumstances should you text your probation officer the message, 'You have some weed?'"
• CNET: "This could happen to any of us. Well, if any of us was serving probation."
• Metro: This UK (!) outlet takes a more narrative approach: "When prospects look dire and family and friends neglect them, some folks resort to dialing the dealer. However, one man decided to avoid this route, opting to contact a far more unusual confidant instead."

And on and on. (The guy who butt-dialed 911 during a drug deal seemed to get better treatment.)