Ann Coulter: I Watch MSNBC While Cleaning My Guns

That Atlantic's "What I Read" feature is typically a straight-forward literary affair, with big names rattling off the newspapers, websites, magazines, and TV shows that keep them informed (with a little Girl With the Dragon Tattoo thrown in). Ann Coulter's recitation of her media diet, however, is downright hilarious. Highlights:

• On television: "All my TVs are on MSNBC all day so that I can listen while I'm cooking, dusting, cleaning my guns, polishing my Reagan busts, marinating veal chops, autographing copies of my new book Demonic, correcting errors in Maureen Dowd's columns, etc., etc."

• Where CNN fits in: "I only go to CNN if MSNBC, Fox, TV Land, WGN, TBS, USA, Bravo, HGTV and BBC America are in commercials. It doesn't happen very often, but when it does, boy, do I appreciate having CNN."
• On her subscriptions: "In addition to my beloved Treason Times," aka, the New York Times, "I subscribe to Human Events and Newsmax. I also get hundreds of pictures of Rep. Anthony Weiner's penis every day. I don't even remember subscribing to it."
• On social media: "I'm on Twitter. It's the only way to follow me and not get your ass beat by my bodyguard."

Click for the entire piece, which include an explanation of the valuable safety tips she's picked up by watching true-crime shows. (More Ann Coulter stories.)